I spent my birthday in the company of old friends at a fantastic restaurant - whilst my children were being babysat at home. It was “vibey”. There were many young, unattached individuals with loads of energy. The best part of the night was when I decided to go back home to relieve the babysitter of her duties while I happily took over again. That sounds pathetic, I know! The problem was that I just couldn‘t let my hair down. I was constantly checking my phone for messages, and calls that I just was not going to receive that night.
Who am I? This is an area I‘ve done a lot of reflecting on…
Going from free-to-be me, to free only within my four walls is a really difficult reality to grasp. Accepting the change that comes with becoming a responsible parent in the early stages is just as difficult. Who am I now, without my little sprouts?
My thoughts have changed, my goals have changed, and everything else seems to have come to a complete halt when it comes to me, and who I was before. I‘m so busy educating myself and applying a proper hands-on approach with my little ones that all I’ve come to know for sure is - how to be a mom, and what it takes; from waking up in the middle of the night and being their source of comfort when they’ve had a nightmare to using the best baby fabric softener when doing the laundry.
I may have been suffering a bit from separation anxiety - initially. I do believe us moms experience it, too! But it‘s not that I have changed as a person, per say, but rather how I have grown, and that it is my direction in life which has shifted, not my personality or character.
I just openly needed to accept the adjustment in direction and shift accordingly to be in receipt of all the rewards that come with being a new care-giver. Life will never be the same, but I can assure you that my life has monumentally evolved since I discovered my purpose in my children‘s lives - and the significant value that added.
Today, that‘s who I am… mom! Well at least that‘s what they call me. You may say that I‘m a jack of all trades and a master of none. Except when it comes to loving my children unconditionally for eternity - no matter how often they attempt to drive me up the wall and cause me to be late. Being a mom is cool, it‘s better than cool - it‘s spectacular and it‘s a privilege! I‘m investing in my children‘s lives and future. There is no higher paying job in the world than that!